"Death is the Only Sincerity"

A certain person said, “In the Saint’s mausoleum there is a poem that goes:
'If in one’s heart
He follows the path of sincerity,
Though he does not pray
Will not the gods protect him?'
What is this path of sincerity?"
A man answered him by saying, “You seem to like poetry. I will answer you
with a poem.
As everything in this world is but a sham,
Death is the only sincerity."
~ Yamamato Tsunetomo "Hagakure"


I was reminded of this passage when I had the misfortune to be present to the funerals of two patriarchs. One was from my own family, and the other from a family that I am very close to. I won't go in to any more specific details, in order to avoid any offense or defamation to either family. I only bring up my closeness to the deaths to point out that I had the privilege to be around for some of the preparations before and arrangements after the deaths. The two scenarios offered a contrast that brought a new light to the above passage.

The two men, we'll call them Greg and Alonzo, lived considerably different lives. Greg, had been abusive and unfaithful to his wife, he had lived with anger that would at times be aimed at his children. Alonzo had lived a life full of love, his family loved and adored him, he was active in his community. When Alonzo died, it was peaceful, his children and grandchildren had said their goodbyes, he had lived a full life and was ready to pass. When Greg died, there was only his wife and a night nurse, he kicked and thrashed against it, perhaps realizing that the end was near and the life he had lived was not the memory that he wanted to leave behind.

"The end is important in all things."